The Tourist's guide to being a Non-Tourist in New York City

-So I'm an English person. With an English accent. Living in New York City. 

It is extremely annoying being hounded by the guys consistently trying to sell you tour bus passes. Me and my New Zealander friend were walking down the street behind one of the tour bus touts and as soon as he caught our accents he spun around and started trying to sell us stuff. No Sir. "We live here," (kindly piss off, k?)

It's an ongoing joke that we could write a book for those wanting to blend in with the locals whilst still hitting up the best places in the city and so here I am, writing some of them down as I go.

First things first.

GETTING AROUND

The big one - jaywalking is a thing. Roll with it.

I have been here over a year and have never once seen anyone be pulled up for crossing the road without using a crossing and everyone does it. I have crossed right in front of a police car and had no issues, in fact it hit the news when an old man got pulled for it. (Here) If the road is clear - cross it. Also, if you can get to the front of the crowd waiting to cross, do so and be prepared to march across before you get lost in the crowd. Finally, it is totally acceptable to stand in the road as you wait probably no more than 5 feet or so but just so you can easily peer down the street. You'll look like a true New Yorker in no time.

Yellow cabs are NOT the best way to get around.

New York traffic is horrendous. Once you've checked it off your bucket list and then want to get anywhere productively - Go on foot/subway.

The Subway is not as scary as it may seem.

The subway (note; not 'The Metro') is actually super easy to use. I recommend downloading the app which has the map and train times so instead of screaming 'tourist' you could just be checking your smartphone. Uptown trains go up on the map, downtown trains go down on the map. Stations indicated by a white dot are express line stops and black/white are local. Sure there are weirdos but this is New York. Keep your head down and don't give in to the guys who come onto the train and shout at everyone asking for money. Avoid eye contact and you'll do grand.

Wow! Time has flown!

So the last time I updated this I had only just arrived in America! Almost 11 months ago! WOW! The time has gone so unbelievably quickly.

I met my host family on 6th June 2013 and SO much has happened in that time it will be nearly impossible to go into a great amount of detail so allow me to bullet point a few pros/cons I have learned about being and au pair during my time here.

CONS:

Sure, when my mum asks me about my week and I can answer "Oh, the kids were in school during the week, so I went horse riding, we had a massage and got our nails done, we went for pizza and ice cream and I had a nap" I realize it's tricky to complain about my life style but being an Au Pair is a strangely difficult life to live. 

• This job is HARD.

Long hours, screaming kids, the dishwasher needs emptying and the dogs are barking, you have a list as long of your arm to keep track off. Trying to keep on top of a 10 year olds homework schedule should be a job in itself but you have manage. This is not a vacation! You need to be organised and reliable. These are little humans you’re looking after. I have read posts about people who lied on their application and began looking after 6 month olds. These kids are your employer’s lives; treat them as best as you can.

• Overworking is an easy thing to fall into.
  We are one of the family, and I certainly can appreciate the benefits that come with the home life however there are a lot of expectations about what you're supposed to do around the house. It's confusing. I am trying to not consistently over work, but when I have been told several times to keep all dishes out of the sink yet when my hostdad is at home during the day he leaves several dirty dishes and I am expected to shift them? Not my job. But when my hostmum comes home who does she scold for it being a mess? Me. Yep. On average I have figured out I work 5-7 hours more than I should per week, but that’s fine with me. I have  had more time off this year than I should have so I feel it balances out. Some people have  gone into rematch after working up to 80 hours a week! Be careful.

• Make sure your hours of work are clearly set out. Grey areas are stressful.

So the family said they wanted you home to work earlier in the week as they are going out at 6pm. You rush home that Saturday night and when you get in the parents are just sitting watching TV and don’t actually leave until 8pm. It’s enough to cause you rage, trust me.

• You will always be asked for a favour but it can be hard to ask your hostparents for anything.
  
  “Oh, would you mind just nipping to the (dry cleaners/super market/vet/toy store) for me. I just need so and so.” Right. My time off and I’m on an errand run, fairly common and not deadly. If this were my family, sure I would have to run out and do things during the week, however, when my car was getting a service on a weekend asking for a lift to the train station (all of three minutes away) is a huge inconvenience and can’t be done. Looks like I’m walking then.·         
   
• The days are long.
  
  Specifically with school age kids (or the schedule work-free-work). I start at 6:30 some days and don't finish until 10pm or even later on some occasions. Admittedly I have 6 hours off when the kids are in school but lie-ins and early nights are not in my control anymore.
   
• Bye-Bye freedom.
  
  In a lot of cases families have rules to ensure your/their safety. In my friends case she is not allowed to drive more than 10 minutes away from her home which drives her up the wall. No nipping to the mall, she can't visit friends unless they're living super close and she feels trapped in the small town she works in. I appreciate rules for safety but when you're told that being out beyond 11pm makes your host family anxious you feel obliged to sacrifice your social life to keep them happy. It’s a lot like being much younger again, be prepared.
   
• Saving Money is actually really hard.
  
  So this was probably more of a shock to me than I expected. I came out thinking that the $195.75 weekly paycheque I got would be more than enough to keep me travelling every weekend and for me to still be able to save $100 a week. Yes, I probably don’t need to splurge on a $200 pair of boots or eat out 2/3 times a week and perhaps if I were more responsible and wise I would have been able to stick to saving but there you go. Money drains out of my pocket quicker than I know how to cope and it’s an experience many Au Pairs share.
   
• Not everyone makes it to the end of their year.
  
  In fact a surprisingly large amount of people go home before completing the year. Some just don’t get on with the family they to work for. They go into rematch and are unable to find a new family within two weeks and off they go. A girl I arrived with went home as she had a bad back and couldn’t work, she used her holiday time but didn’t recover in time. Similarly a girl broke her ankle and was unable to drive anymore so she left.

PROS:

• This job is AMAZING.
  
  As much as I can sit and list out the negatives of what we have to do as Au Pairs sometimes I find myself grinning for no other reason than life is just that great. Match with the right family and the bond you have with the kids will be something you will never forget. I spend so much time with my kiddies they are basically my best friends. At the beginning it was definitely a rocky relationship as we were all trying to figure out how to get along but now they know I will take no messing and I know how to keep them happy everything is running a lot smoother. We are forever giggling away over some inside joke or having an in depth conversation about their day. I am getting paid to mess around with my besties.
   
• Travel. For free.
  
  Yep. It's a common thing. My hostfamily have a holiday home on the beautiful island of Nantucket and I have accompanied them there several times, as well as weekends away to Hershey's Park, Woodloch Pines etc... I have known people going with their families to Hawaii, Germany and cruises to the Bahamas all free of charge.
   
• You get a very true sense of the culture.
  
  You live with the natives 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You learn what’s popular at the moment, what they eat, what they watch on TV, how busy their lives are. It’s something you will never experience being just a visitor to a country.
   
• You will have made friendships for life.
  
  I came to the USA expecting to make a tonne of cool American friends, but no. It’s surprisingly hard to meet people here unless you’re willing to join a dating website, and I am not at this stage! However, I am friends with girls from all over the globe, New Zealand, South Korea, Mexico, Germany, Brazil, Argentina and I my opinion it’s bloody amazing!
   
• Days off = Time to forget your work life and explore the world.
  
  Most of my weekends are spent in New York City. I have never once sat around on a weekend thinking I have nothing to do. America is vast, it’s foreign, and for me it’s exciting. I love being able to catch the train out on a Saturday and know that even with no plans I will find something to do. Weekend trips to Boston, or just catching the train to Connecticut because some guy in a bar told you where a really good pizza place is are moments that really make this an unforgettable experience.

·         Personally, I love this so much I intend to travel the world by being an Au Pair so I’m sure that tells you a lot!!!

Tarrytown

We go to our host families on Thursday afternoon so on Wednesday evening after orientation we decided to walk into Tarrytown and see what was there. The answer is not much! A few shops and not a lot else. My favourite shop was a 7/11 where I experienced my first officially American Slurpee.

Orientation and New York City Tour

Official day one of orientation. One word? Long! I appreciate that there is a lot of stuff to take in and perhaps it was because I was so excited to go and explore my new surroundings that the day seemed to really quite drag.

However, at the end of day one it was time for the New York City tour. Although it felt a little rushed I absolutely loved it and made some really good friends.

Safe Landing

So once I arrived in Newark I had to go thorough immigration. I had been told by APIA that it can take 2+hours to get through, but realistically it took me less than 30 minutes. All they needed was my visa/passport and a document I had received in my placement pack, I walked through to baggage collection and then made my way towards the exit hoping I would meet someone on the other side.

There was a woman, called Jackie, holding up a bright pick 'Au Pair In America' sign in front of a clipboard. She sat me next to a girl, her name was Frida and she was from Sweden and had arrived a little sooner than I had. We were then moved to another terminal to await the arrival of some more girls from Germany. There were about 6 in total, who all arrived speaking German together making Frida and I a little cut off. I was so thankful there was another none German speaking girl there!!

When everyone had arrived we were put on a mini-bus to take us to the hotel where we would be staying in Tarrytown. It was warm and the hotel was gorgeous, I couldn't believe we were in AMERICA! We left our bags in the hotel lobby and went for a brief talk on our stay here. We had to show that our passports had been stamped, were were told how to apply for a social security number, we got our Au Pair t-shirts and our hotel rooms. Although my room was not ready yet Frida's was and so the pair of us went to go and see what the rooms we were staying in looked like. The rooms were set out for 3 Au Pairs who will be living near one another for the year. We entered Frida's room and found two girls sat in her room already, one who was living in Washington DC with Frida and a girl she had recently met and shared a language with (Afrikaans) who would be living in Boston.

Me and Frida wandered the grounds for a little while and kept checking to see if my room was ready yet. I was eager to meet people I would be living with. I got my room and it was still empty, we ate tea and then at about 8pm US time, 3am my time I went to bed.

Off I go!

So on the morning of Monday 3rd June I woke up at 4:30 am after only about 2 hours sleep. I felt really calm, I had to double check I had everything, got ready, loaded up the car and headed out to the airport. I checked in successfully and said a brief goodbye to my parents. With the ability to Skype so easily (and lets be honest I'm not very good at goodbyes) it doesn't feel like I'm completely leaving everyone at home.

Security was a doddle to get through and I hoped to get breakfast once I was in the departure lounge. I still had several hours until my 9:25 flight so browsed through the shops and looked for some suitable food and a place I could get a couple of magazines so I popped into WHSmiths.

I still had about an hour until I would be able to find out which gate I was boarding from so I sat down with a view of both the runway and an information point so I could watch for my gate. I had only sat down for about a minute when a man who had behind us at the check in desk came and sat next to me. Now please don't get me wrong, I love when people talk to me, I am a chatterbox, but this guy was a little strange and kept staring at me whilst I ate until I replied him. It took me and age to finish my food. Anyway, long story short, I felt obliged to follow him to the gate and stay stood near him until we had boarded.

For some reason I had been upgraded into Economy plus (Thank you Au Pair In America!) and I was able to board a little earlier and had a tonne of extra legroom.

GOOD BYE ENGLAND

AND HELLO AMERICA

Bags Bags Bags

Okay, I have come to terms with the fact that I will have to take two suitcases as well as a carry on which causes a problem with logistics. So two big pull along cases, two hands and a pull along carry on is not going to go well. So I had to look for a new bag to take with me on the flight. I do have several over-the-shoulder bags which I want to take with me but none of them are really big enough for me to fit in everything I would want to take on a long flight. It is also recommended to take a spare pair of clothes in case my luggage were to get lost so I had to accommodate for that too.

We went looking for a bag to take of any kind and we did not find anything in the conventional shopping centers. We did find one lovely bag that was actually a nappy bag and would have fitted a tonne of stuff in! Although the £99 price tag wasn't so lovely for a bag I might not use so much once I arrived State side. We had a look in a department store called John Lewis and I found myself in the luggage section where we found several backpacks. Now that really made sense. I would definitely use it on day hikes and bike rides with the children and the price range was much more reasonable. Most of the rucksacks in John Lewis were aimed for men though so we decided to go to Cheshire Oaks at a later date which is full of outlet stock and so it is usually cheaper and there are several outdoorsy shops.

Once we made it to Cheshire Oaks we went in pretty much every single shop we could see sold bags and actually found a suitcase shop which sold backpacks. They were ideal as I knew they were the right size to fit in the restricted carry-on space on the plane and they were reasonably nice. So ta-dahh,